Learning to Run

It has been on my mind for a few months now, but I think that I want to be able to run... maybe not 10km, but it would be nice to be able to run a full 5km in a fun run or something... In fact, it was actually one of my major milestones for this rounds 12WBT - which just didn't happen...

A 12WBT friend of mine, Dhitri, recently posted about learning to run... and it has gotten me thinking once again about trying... and it has also brought up a lot of excuses that I have been using lately (more about this later though), however there is one legitimate one...

"What about my knee??"

As you know, I had a minor tear in my cartilage over a month ago, and while I can walk around with no problems now, I still need to wear my brace at work as I am on my feet all the time. I am only working a couple of days a week, but I can really feel it at the end of the day.  Now, my physio has told me to use an exercise bike (which I haven't - and that's where the excuses come in too - and I know I really should be using it!) to help build strength.  The trouble is, the last time I went to the gym to do these exercises, my knee was reall aching afterwards... and that worried me.

I have heard wonderful things about running.  That it just clears your mind, it's a good way to de-stress, that the endorphins you get are amazing, that it can really boost your weightloss efforts, that it can shape and tone your body in the most amazing way...

Yet - I am almost too scared to try it! What is that?! Why be scared to try something new? Is it because I am scared I will fail? What I won't complete it?

A few other things holding me back are:

• location - where do I run? I don't want to do laps of an oval cos I think I would get bored... and my place is located on a BIG hill... and probably not the safest area really... am I silly in not wanting to learn to run on a hill?
• having to go somewhere else to run... I know - even I am telling myself to suck it up!!
• wanting to learn to run on a treadmill in a gym... for some reason, I feel this is better than running where everyone can see me huffing along... Am I being silly?
• feeling like I can't do it... I'm not good with learning - I want to be great straight away... now I know that's silly! haha!!

I have had the C25K app on my phone for a while now... I would love to start using it... I love that I could be running 5km in 9 weeks - it almost seems impossible! such a short amount of time!!!

I wonder if I could tackle the hills around home then... haha!

Looking Back...

I'm being a little naughty (I should be working on a scientific report right now... haha!) and I am writing a post on something I have been meaning to write for the last week...

2007 - At my (previously)
heaviest weight

When I went back onto Calorie King I was going through all of my old profile settings and came across some photos.  One was my original before photo... when I was at my heaviest of 99kg and the second was my 'after' photo where I wasn't at my goal weight (never reached it lol), I was still 10kg from reaching goal.

My 'after' photo - in Paris
& on top of the world

There is about 18 months difference between the photos, and I can remember how I was feeling both times the photos were taken.  At my heaviest, I remember feeling so self concious.  I was with friends who I know loved me for me, but at the same time, looking back, I know that I was miserable.  I wasn't happy with who I was, I was battling depression, I felt frumpy, and just felt like I filled the room - and not in the good way.  The 'after' photo I was in Paris.  I was living my dream of going to Europe.  I felt like I was on top of the world.  I felt like I could do anything! I wasn't battling depression anymore and all of my health problems had disapeared - I could do anything!!!

Close to my lightest weight
of my weightloss journey

I don't have any photos of me at my lightest weight, but I do have one at a friends party when we were playing pool.  I am only a couple of kilos off my lightest at this point.  Maybe it's just me, but I can see the differences in my smile - I am just so much happier and more content within myself... I love feeling this way... the power of the mind is amazing!  This photo was taken in April 2010 - it actually doesn't seem that long ago. It is amazing how much can change in such a short time!

I'm working on a new me...

But, here I am now.  At my heaviest weight ever... but I am determined to make all of the changes in my life work for me... rather than have me running around with no idea what is happening.  I actually don't have a photo of me at the moment, but I think what I would like to do is to have a current "before" photo, you know, starting fresh and all of that. 

I have learned a lot over the last 5 years, and I know that this will help me with my current weight loss journey... I can't wait to feel on top of the world again!!  I have even more going for me now than I did back in 2008! I have a wonderful new family and I am living my current dream of going to uni!  Big changes can take a lot of getting used to - but I know that I can do it!!!

Making Things "Easy"

B and I are time poor... we have lots on in our lives and generally aren't that great at managing it all - at least time wise. So, we have decided to cut out "one more thing" and have decided to go on Lite n' Easy for a couple of weeks.

I have used it in the past and I quite liked the food and the convenience of it all. One of the things I loved the most about it was (when I was single and living on my own) was the variety!  I found it so hard to have a good variety in my diet and stick to a budget.

We have decided to do lunches and dinners only, as breakfasts are generally pretty easy anyway.  I will be doing 7 days worth and B will do 5 days worth as he has work lunches that he attends.  We always have a family dinner at his parents on sunday nights, which means that my extra dinner will become his 6th, so in planning, it seems that it will work.

One aspect of starting LnE that I am really looking forward to is lunches!  I have become quite slack in getting my lunch sorted, and I have been buying my lunches when I am at uni or work. I was concerned about he money aspect of it all, because, let's face it, LnE isn't exactly cheap... and does cost more than a weekly grocery shop.  But when I actually sat down and thought about it, I realised that we were buying groceries, buying lunches and then having take out on top... so I think that we might actually save a little money... who would have thought!!

I also love that it is calorie controlled.  Now, I am proud to say that I haven't had chocolate since I made the commitment a few days ago, however, I still haven't really been counting my calories.  Last night was a special night out for B and I, so we did both splurge a bit, but this morning I did make a healthy breakfast choice, so that's a good sign I think.

For the next week we will be eating what we have in the pantry and freezer to make room for our LnE delivery, so I really don't think the next week will be the healthiest week... but I am ok with that... I am just so relieved to have something easy coming up... especially with my final exams being 3 weeks away!

I have mentioned before that I am not the greatest with eating fruit... and I remember having the best eating habits with LnE in the past... so I am looking forward to having a more balanced diet and more energy... with less stress!! For myself, I will be on the 1500 calorie plan, although if I exercised 3 times a week for up to 20 minutes LnE calculated that I should be on 1800 calories... while that sounds awesome, I don't think it's really for me, so for now I will be sticking to the 1500 calories. Calorie king currently has me set to 1640 calories, so this will be fine.

Also, I know I haven't popped in here with my weekly weigh in, but I lost 100 grams.  I am ok with this as my weight jumped up by 2kg during the week, so being under is a plus.

I am finally starting to feel like myself again... and I am loving it!  i am feeling more in control of my eating and my mindset, I'm not sure if it shows to others, but I love having my confidence back!!

I went down town and bought a couple of tops for winter, so it's just nice having clothes that fit and make me feel pretty - even if they are larger clothes... it really does a lot for the mindset!

Blogger Challenge Week 11: Reflection

Only one and a half weeks to go!!!  Can you believe it?!

In week 1, I asked you to answer some introductory questions about yourself and why you had decided to do the 12WBT.  I think it’s a great opportunity to reflect on how you have done and how you feel about everything now that we are at the tail end of the program.

1. How are you feeling about the 12WBT program now that you have almost completed it?

2. Looking back on what you wrote in week 1, did you achieve all that you were hoping to?

3. Did you find that blogging was beneficial to your 12WBT journey? Will you continue to blog once this round is over?

4. Did your exercise go according to plan or  did you have to change it around compared with what you wrote in Week 1?

5. How did your greatest strength help you this round? Was it as you thought it would?

6. Did the fears that you outlined in Week 1 come to pass? How/how not?

7. What is the most valuable lesson you have learned from this program?

8. In question 9 of the Week 1 challenge question, you wrote about your downfall.  How did you go with this challenge over the last 11 weeks?

9. What is your biggest achievement since the start of the program?  What are you the most proud of?

10. Will you be coming back for another round of the 12WBT?

If you are a little confused about what to do, please read through the blogger challenge instructions (opens in a new window).

To link your answer to this blog post, just click the add your blog button below. From here you paste the link for your actual post (not your blog).This weeks Blogger Challenge will close at 11:59pm on Wednesday 2nd May 2012.

Winter Garden

Miss 3 and I spent yesterday afternoon gardening, getting our winter veggie patch ready.  Now, I have to admit, there aren't many veggies that I eat whichwill grow during winter, so our garden will be relatively small.

Yesterday in Canberra was a very cold day... and made me a little more than grateful that this seasons gardening will hopefully be very low maintenance as I really don't want to be out there in the cold with wet hands from tolling through the soil.

Miss 3 holding the worms in our garden

About a week ago, Miss 3 and I ripped out the old (and original!) raised garden bed to get it ready for planting.  After ripping out the veggies, we mixed the remaining mulch through the soil (it's sugar cane mulch and I have since learned that it doesn't decompose that quickly - which is what I was told at the garden shop lol).  Then we placed a layer of worm castings from our worm farm over the top - worms included!!  Hopefully these helpful buggers will help our vege garden and reproduce to make more. Finally we placed another layer of soil over the top. We left this for a few days to let it all sit and settle.

The freshly planted winter veggie garden

Then, yesterday we went to the local Bunnings and bought a few different veggies that we will hopefully use in our winter cooking.  We have just planted:

• snow peas
• lettuce
• leeks
• onion
• shallots
• garlic

Miss 3 feeling proud of our efforts

In the other garden bed we still have lettuce, carrots and a couple of broccoli plants (which haven't done much).  I am leaving this garden in place for a few more weeks, and then I will replant it to look like the one above.  This way we will have a bit of a rotation system going, and onions and garlic will last for quite a while and we use a lot of them, so that will be great.

In my garden, in total I have the following planted:

• thyme, basil and organo
• capsicum (which won't last much longer in the frosts, so I will probably replant the lavendar in this pot)
• snow peas
lettuce
leeks
onion
shallots
garlic
carrots
broccoli
strawberries
potatoes
chives and parsely

I think the next step will be mulching the top of the freshly planted garden bed.  I am still learning about this, but I believe it helps the plants in the frosts.

And for a bit of variety - some flowers!

 

I made it!

I made it through yesterday without a single bit of chocolate... even though there is still plenty of chocolate in our house, and Miss 3's chocolate stash sitting on the counter.

Quite sad that I need to celebrate this achievement, but it's all about the small wins!

Also, last night Miss 3 and I had strawberries for dessert!  Although I had mine with Balsamic Vinegar... yum yum!

Snacks

As promised, here is my list of snacks... please feel free to add more by commenting below! I have been trying to think of what I used to snack on.

• Piece of fruit (eg mandarin, peach, orange, nectarine, kiwi fruit, etc)
• Fruit smoothie (tub of yoghurt, frozen berries, skim milk - blended)
• Cruskits with honey, vegemite or cheese
• Tub of yoghurt
• A box of sultanas
• 2 slices of cheese
• A cup of Jarrah Hot Chocolate
• A packet of popcorn

I think that's all I got so far...

I Forgot How Hard It Is...

Since my last post, I thought I had done ok eating wise... and then I remembered all of those little things that I thought would be 'ok'....

I have failed at not eating the easter eggs... it was as if I justified eating them... I couldn't say no... but then, I know that I struggle to 'detox' from chocolate after I have had a massive binge, because really, all I have been doing lately is binging.

So, this morning, I have been thinking about chocolate, and instead I am currently eating a yoghurt.  I have also as yet not put together a list of snacks, so will be doing so straight after this post so that it will be in it's own thread.

Each day I look at my body and can't help but be a little disgusted with what I have done to it again... I thought I was still chubby when I was at my lowest weight, but looking back I was doing so well. (isn't hindsight awesome?!)

So, it's totally up to me to step up to this.  It is all on my shoulders and only I can make the best decisions for me... I need to stop with the excuses and just get going with it.  First step is to get my eating habits sorted.  Over the last week I have realised that it's not going to be simply "getting back on the wagon", it is going to take a lot more effort to do so... and quite honestly, that scares me!!

I have forgotten a lot of my recipes and snacks and such, so I think it is time to trawl back through Calorie King and see what I used to do... And I have to admit, that the thought of going back to Lite and Easy has crossed my mind as we are really struggling with our time management lately (and I know there were a few foods that LnE did that I really enjoyed.)

I am nervous about how I am going to go with my uni exams coming up in 3 weeks.  I already know that I get hungry when I am studying and I crave sugary foods. I was actually talking to other students about this, and I found it interesting to know I wasn't the only one!!  Any tips??

Anyway, this is my little update for now, trying to put more of my thoughts out there!!

Blogger Challenge Week 10: Benefits

Now that we are nearing the end of Round 1 of the 12WBT, you will have noticed a few changes in yourself, in how you look, how you act and your fitness levels.  By now you will have seen many benefits from doing the program.  Some of you will have reached a lot of your goals, others may have felt as though they haven’t done as well as they had hoped.  Either way, you will have noticed many benefits and had a few breakthroughs along the way.  The important thing to remember, is that you are still here, and you are still trying.

What are the benefits you have noticed in the way you look?

What are the benefits you have noticed in your mindset? What breakthroughs have you had along the way?

What are the benefits you have noticed in your fitness levels?

And finally, what benefits have you noticed in your health? (You may want to look back at Week 5’s post on Health)

If you are a little confused about what to do, please read through the blogger challenge instructions (opens in a new window).

To link your answer to this blog post, just click the add your blog button below. From here you paste the link for your actual post (not your blog). This weeks Blogger Challenge will close at 11:59pm on Wednesday 25th April 2012.

Cracked it... and now it's really time to take action...

By cracked it, I don't mean that I have gone bonkers... I am actually refering to the fact that I now weigh over 100kg... yup... I weighed in yesterday at 100.5kg...

I have come to the realisation that Easter and I do not mix well together... especially in a (now) 3 person household where one is a chocoholic (that would be ME!), one non-chocoholic (B) and one who would be a chocoholic if we let her (Miss 3).  Basically, we got 3 peoples worth of chocolate and pretty much only me eating it... which is really not a good option...

So, last night I had a really good talk to myself (hmmm.... am I bonkers?!) and I have come to realise that I am honestly feeling more at peace with getting back onto the wagon and getting it going again.  I have also decided to come up with a list of healthy snacks (my downfall) and I will be continuing to use the Menu Planner app on my iPad as it has honestly made life easier for us.

This morning I measured myself for the first time in months, and I have to admit, I was more than a little astounded by the numbers that came up!

Week 1
Wednesday 18 April 2012

		Change	Total Loss
Weight:	100.5kg	n/a	n/a
Arm:	30.5cm	n/a	n/a
Bust:	116cm	n/a	n/a
Waist:	125cm	n/a	n/a
Hips:	126cm	n/a	n/a
Thigh:	73cm	n/a	n/a

I have come to the decision that it is time that I start putting myself out there 100%. Owning up to my stuff ups and celebrating the wins.  I am only human afterall!

So, I am very much a goal oriented person, and as B and I have been thinking about taking a holiday (like a cruise) for a while now (I mentioned it a few posts ago that it may be a bit of a reward) I have decided to aim towards that.  I have also come up with a few other goals/rewards to help me along.  Now, I have put away all of the remaining easter eggs, although I do know where they are, I am hoping to use them as more of a reward.  Now, I know that you shouldn't reward yourself with food, but I am hoping that having them there will help to teach me a bit of self control.

I have put together the following list of goals.  I have pinched this idea and format from Mandy over at Fearless, Fabulous, Female... and Forty!! (hope that's ok Mandy!) I may add to this list, as I go along, but at this stage, this is it:

	Heaviest Ever	100.5kg
	Goal Weight	74kg
WEIGHT	MINI GOAL DETAILS	STATUS
99.9	Back to the 90's
95.5	5kg and 5% lost
	Fit into my 'fat' pants comfortably
90.5	10kg and 10% lost
89.9	in the 80's
	Complete the C25K
89.6	Get to Overweight BMI of 29.9
	Size 14 clothes
85.5	15kg lost
	Run a 5km Fun Run
80.5	20 kg lost
79.9	Livin' in the 70's
	Size 12 clothes
75.5	25kg lost
74.6	Get to Healthy BMI of 24.9
** 74 **	GOAL
70.5	30kg lost
69.9	in the 60's

 

 

See - gym bag is packed and is in the car!

I am really missing exercising too... and I am so afraid of injuring my knee further, I have been avoiding it.  My physio has given me a few exercises to do (which I really should do! lol) and overally is really happy with my progress.  I think I find it a bit hard to go to the gym and sit on the bike or the cross trainer for only about 10 mins (as much as I can take at the moment.) - mostly I think it's frustrating, but I need to start somewhere I know. In fact, today I felt so motivated that I actually packed my gym bag and put it in the car!!  Now I just need to get my sorry arse to the gym! I have been meaning to pack it and have it ready in the car... have to admit I am a little proud I did it... baby steps!

You might remember a while ago I set myself the goal of running in 3 fun runs.  Well, 2 of them have gone, but the Mother's Day Classic is coming up and I have recieved my tag and number, and I really think that it will be a good thing to do.  Now, with my knee and my fitness levels at the moment, I won't be running, but I do want to do it - even though it will be the weekend before my exams start.

I am also wanting to get the winter veggie garden up and running, so over the next week I am planning on getting the patch ready and planted. Speaking of the garden, I cooked up some of the most delicious tomato relish the other day using this recipe and tomatoes from our garden.  We have started using a lot more of the veggies we have grown and it's so wonderful to know that we are eating fresh and that we have grown it ourselves!