Monday, 23 April 2012

I Forgot How Hard It Is...

Since my last post, I thought I had done ok eating wise... and then I remembered all of those little things that I thought would be 'ok'....

I have failed at not eating the easter eggs... it was as if I justified eating them... I couldn't say no... but then, I know that I struggle to 'detox' from chocolate after I have had a massive binge, because really, all I have been doing lately is binging.

So, this morning, I have been thinking about chocolate, and instead I am currently eating a yoghurt.  I have also as yet not put together a list of snacks, so will be doing so straight after this post so that it will be in it's own thread.

Each day I look at my body and can't help but be a little disgusted with what I have done to it again... I thought I was still chubby when I was at my lowest weight, but looking back I was doing so well. (isn't hindsight awesome?!)

So, it's totally up to me to step up to this.  It is all on my shoulders and only I can make the best decisions for me... I need to stop with the excuses and just get going with it.  First step is to get my eating habits sorted.  Over the last week I have realised that it's not going to be simply "getting back on the wagon", it is going to take a lot more effort to do so... and quite honestly, that scares me!!

I have forgotten a lot of my recipes and snacks and such, so I think it is time to trawl back through Calorie King and see what I used to do... And I have to admit, that the thought of going back to Lite and Easy has crossed my mind as we are really struggling with our time management lately (and I know there were a few foods that LnE did that I really enjoyed.)

I am nervous about how I am going to go with my uni exams coming up in 3 weeks.  I already know that I get hungry when I am studying and I crave sugary foods. I was actually talking to other students about this, and I found it interesting to know I wasn't the only one!!  Any tips??

Anyway, this is my little update for now, trying to put more of my thoughts out there!!

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